Top Ten List Of What To Do And What Not To Do In Relationships

Most of us who have been intimately involved with someone beyond the infatuation stage know that relationships are like a rollercoaster ride. When things are good, they are very, very good. When things are bad, they are very, very bad. As a relationship coach, I have developed Top 10 Lists—one for men and one for women on 10 things to do and not to do in relationships.



  1. Just listen to your partner without offering advice.
  2. Trust and respect her.
  3. Treat her as an equal partner in your relationship.
  4. Stay and support her when she gets emotional. She is looking for understanding, not solutions.
  5. Continue your courtship even after she’s committed to you. Continue to create romance in your relationship.

When we face pain in relationships our first response is often to sever bonds rather than to maintain commitment.― bell hooks

  1. Do little things on a regular basis. A woman doesn’t care if you call her at work to say, “I love you” or if you buy a new TV for the living room. The small things are worth just as much as the big ones.
  2. Honor any agreements you have made with her.
  3. Encourage her goals and direction.
  4. Find out what your partner would like to do and then do it with her.
  5. Say, “I’m sorry” when you’ve done something you regret or that was hurtful to your partner, whether intentionally or unintentionally.


Love and Loved is the Ultimate Gift from God
  1. Go to bed angry with your partner.
  2. Insist he always share his feelings with you. Talking about feelings is more what women need.
  3. Attempt to converse with your partner during a good movie or sporting event.
  4. Continue to “give” in what you perceive is a lopsided relationship when you are at a point of resentment.
  5. Criticize him or put him down, especially the things he does.
  6. Scold your partner as if he were a child.
  7. Use sex as a prize for good behavior or the withholding of sex as punishment for “bad” behavior.
  8. Compare him to a fictional character in a book, movie or soap drama and find him lacking.
  9. Violate his privacy.
  10. Try to change him. Appreciate the man he is right now.
The Bible Say’s About Relationships
Job 22:23-26 ESV
 If you return to the Almighty you will be built up; if you remove injustice far from your tents, if you lay gold in the dust, and gold of Ophir among the stones of the torrent-bed, then the Almighty will be your gold and your precious silver. For then you will delight yourself in the Almighty and lift up your face to God.